| The
Top 16 "Worst Breakup Excuses"
16> "Ow... I banged my head! That really hurt! Hey... who are
YOU?"
15> "I'm sorry,
but there just isn't room in my life right now for both you and my
vibrator."
14> "I've got
this disease... it's called herpigonasyphalaids. Very contagious."
13> "You're
too young for me. I mean, too *old*. We're the same age? Well, that doesn't
work for me, either."
12> "We're
just so different, you and I. You're an extrovert, I'm an introvert. I like
classical, you like heavy metal. And of course *I'm* not a physically repulsive
raving psychopath."
11> "You've
gone from 'sponge-worthy' to merely 'spongy.'"
10> "Dear
Christine: By the time you read this I'll be a woman..."
9> "I have
early-onset onanism."
 |
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8> "You're
no longer the wealthy, gullible, and desperately lonely man I fell in love
with."
7> "My penis,
uh, fell off, and I, er, lost it... yeah -- on the subway, I think."
6> "Less filling?
LESS FILLING??? I don't even know who you ARE anymore!"
5> "My dog
is having puppies and I need to take a year off in order to train them to
attack your picture."
4> "It's not
*you*, it's me. Specifically, me would like to sleep with your sister."
3> "I had lunch
at the Hunan Palace today and according to the place mat, you're a snake
and I'm a mongoose."
2> "We just
don't have anything in common anymore -- you're a morning person, and I want
to see your severed head impaled on a steel railroad spike."
and Topfive.com's
Number 1 Worst Breakup Excuse...
1> "I'm holding
you back from all the other lives you could be ruining."
Thank you Chris White!
[ The Top 5 List
www.topfive.com ]
[Copyright 2001
by Chris White
]
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1.
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6.
Broken
Hearts and Breakups
Article
by:
AUTHOR:
Jack Zavada is the author of four novels and
over 5,000 magazine and newspaper articles. His web site is
http://www.inspiration-for-singles.com.
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