Healing a Broken
Heart? Learn To Forgive
By Susan
Russo
"When a deep injury is done to us, we never recover
until we forgive." -Alan Paton
As you are going through the various stages of
healing yourself after the end of a relationship; many people stumble when
trying to get through this very crucial stage: Learning to forgive.
Depending on your circumstances, forgiveness
may seem impossible to you right now. You've probably endured a lot of heartache
and pain while going through this process and the blame and or guilt that
you may be experiencing can keep you stuck from moving forward.
Whether you blame the other person or have guilt
and you beat yourself up over it, learning to forgive will put you on the
right path. It will be a gift you give to yourself.
Even though you may not feel capable of forgiveness
right now; the sooner you do this...the sooner you will...let go for good.
You have to learn how to forgive the other person. But...first...you have
to forgive yourself!
If you've made mistakes, forgive yourself and
go on. There is nothing you can do now to change the past, but you can affect
your future.
Forgiving yourself takes the pressure off of
you for not being perfect. And, it gets rid of guilt. You must learn to forgive
yourself before you can forgive others.
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We are all on a journey through life. Sometimes
we make mistakes, which is part of a normal process on this journey. The
mistakes that we make can result in painful experiences; these are the "lessons
of life." But, it is through these trials that we learn the most.
The key is learning something from what has caused
you pain so as not to repeat the same mistakes again. Walk away from this
situation with the knowledge that you are stronger and smarter. Forgiving
will open that door.
Second, forgive him or her. If you don't, you
will be holding onto the past. You may carry anger and resentment around
with you which will hurt you...more than them.
Harboring negative emotions can make you bitter
and resentful. It can and will permeate all areas of your life and it makes
it more difficult to enjoy today.
Not forgiving keeps you trapped exactly where
you don't want to be... holding onto memories of the past. Every time you
begin to think of this person; what they did or didn't do, what you said
or didn't say, consciously release them from your mind. Let these thoughts
go and fill your mind with thoughts of goodness and the things that you are
looking forward to experiencing in your life.
Gaining control of your thoughts, releasing all
of the negative memories and releasing all of the imagined confrontations
you could have with this person will be the beginning of letting go of what
is behind you and moving on to a better future.
You can't change the past but you can make a
significant difference in how you approach what's ahead of you. Stay focused
on the positive. Stay focused on what you want, not on what you had that
didn't work.
Once you find forgiveness you will regain control
of you life. It's your choice!
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Read more about it at:
http://www.whystay.com
Susan Russo is the President of Pinnacle
Thought Inc. Publisher for books and resources which provide inspiration,
self-empowerment and the tools and strategies to help move you toward personal
success and fulfillment. She is editor of "You've Got Power" ezine and author
of "There Is Life After What's-His-Name. |
